A Change in the Making

It's been a lifetime struggle.  My weight. I was never a skinny kid. I was always "husky."  I struggled. I was always active. I danced since I was 3 and continued into high school. I played sports - soccer, baseball, softball and then as I got older and into junior high school and high school I was on the volleyball, and soccer teams. I was a manager for the track team. I did this and held a part time job, as well. I got into college and still struggled. I remember starving myself and going on crazy diets like the crazy cabbage soup one. Anyone relate?  I wanted to be skinny like my roommates and all those other girls on campus. I was probably my thinnest in college.

I got out of college. I went through a period of depression. Of course I medicated myself with food.  Then one day I had enough. I started eating healthy and exercising. By this time I had my first teaching job and was motivated to keep my weight down.  I joined Weight Watchers and exercised religiously.  I was succesful and list more than 50 pounds on WW. A short time later I met my husband and. gained a little.  I was married. I got comfortable.

Six months later I got pregnant with my first child. I gained more.  I only lost what I gained in baby weight. We moved. I suffered a devastating miscarriage. I medicated with food. A few months later I got pregnant again. We had a beautiful baby girl.  I never lost the weight. When my son, our first child, was in second grade he was diagnosed with Aspergers Disorder. Guess how I coped?  Yup, with food.

I initially started looking into Lap Band about 4 years ago. I went to the orientation. I met with my surgeon. I completed all the steps to prepare myself for surgery. I was just waiting for approval from my insurance.  There was some miscommunication about where I was having my surgery and they denied me. Okay. Um. Well, food is my friend. Food will never let me down.  

And then a surprise pregnancy!  While pregnant with my third child I got an approval letter from my insurance for a different surgery center. Of course I couldn't go through with it because I was pregnant. With my third pregnancy I had Gestational Diabetes that I had to control with Insulin. 4 shots a day and pricking my finger numerous times a day. I was a good girl. I ate right and was able to control my blood sugar. My son was born a healthy 7 pounds 12 ounces and no complications.  After my son was born my diabetes went away but my diabetes counselor warned me to get the weight off or the diabetes would return. 

He's 2 now and the weight plus more is still here and I am at my heaviest.  I have pain in my feet. I am tired all day. My migraines are out of control. I can't keep up with my kids. 

About 6 months ago I decided to go through the Lap Band process again. I got discouraged a because I knew how long it could take for all the approval. I called my doctor about 2 months ago and thankfully all my info was still on record and was expedited through the process. Within weeks I was approved once again for surgery at a surgery center 45 minutes away.  I'll take it!

I created this blog to keep track of my progress, my daily intake, my successes, my thoughts, disappointments, frustrations. Hopefully it will help and inspire others to start a healthy lifestyle.  Lap Band isn't the answer for everyone. It's just what's right for me.  I am doing this for me, for my health, for my husband, and for my kids.  

I am ready to start a new life. Let's do this!